When I was pregnant with Karlee I kept telling my self, "Oh I don't need to do that yet, we have a over a month until the baby will be born".... but then she came early.
-I hadn't packed a hospital bag, haha Allen packed for me in his frantic state of mind.. all I had was like 12 pair of underwear and maybe a t-shirt. He was nervous but that's a different story.
-We didn't have a car seat to bring her home in.
-I hadn't washed any of her clothes, I didn't have a dresser to even put her clothes in.
-I hadn't read up on how to breast feed at all... so I was clueless
-I didn't have a breast pump, nursing bra, or anything that would help with nursing.
-I didn't have diapers or bottles.
-I didn't have any idea how to bathe a tiny baby or what I would need to bathe one.
-I didn't really even like to hold brand new babies. I was okay with a 3 month old .. but not new.
I just didn't know what to do with a baby.
Now, of course not everyone has all of these things done when they have a baby but, it made me feel incredibly overwhelmed and freaked out. I remember crying the day after I had her wondering if they were ever going to let me take her home because I was so unprepared. Like they were going to know that I wasn't going to be a good mom and just tell me that they were going to keep her. (Who is they? I don't know.) I was crazy.
Everything worked out and Allen (along with help from friends and family) was my hero. He got everything figured out. Found all the stuff that I felt like I needed to have and when it was time to bring her home everything went fine.
This time around, to avoid as much over dramatic, hormone overloaded, postpartum, craziness, I have decided to make sure I feel more prepared.
He has a bed, in a bedroom, with a dresser for his clothes. His clothes are washed, folded and put away.
He has a car seat. Actually he has 2.
I have a plan for breastfeeding and also a back up for bottle feeding if breastfeeding doesn't work out.
I have my hospital bag already packed. (I know this seems way too early but I feel much more relaxed now.)
I have a bag backed for Karlee so that when its time to go to the hospital she can go stay with someone. I have about 5 people lined up for her. It just depends on the time of day.
Now baby boy can just cook as long as he wants. (Hopefully long.) When he decides to come, I can just think about getting him here safe. I wont be worried about what Allen brought in my hospital bag, or if Karlee has everything she needs. I wont be worried that "they" wont let me keep my baby because I didn't buy him things that he is going to need. I'm not stressed about figuring out how to feed him. All I have to do now is relax and enjoy time with my family of three. I am sure if he comes early there will be stress about his health, but I am much more familiar with what happens with a preemie baby now and I know that everything will work out okay. Bring on the sleepless nights and big sister jealousy.
I feel like I can finally say I am excited about having another baby (and not be lying about it.)
Karlee even started saying baby the other day. She must be more relaxed too. She gets super excited when we talk about baby... but only at the part of the story where "Karlee gets to go to grandmas house and have a sleep over!"
I'm sure no one cares to read about this but I had to document it somewhere that I am actually excited about having another baby. For my own sake and his.
2004 Nissan Armada LE
